There's no shortage of pseudonyms for the girls: Twin Peaks, Lady Lumps, Fun Bags, and other increasingly ridiculous euphemisms. But what about women who are no longer au naturel? If natural breasts get a laundry list of aliases, should breast cancer survivors get their own list of tongue-in-cheek names suited to a post-mastectomy or lumpectomy lifestyle?

Perhaps it would be more mature to simply move on, but in an effort to make folks smile, we have elected to not be mature and to list our 30 favorite candidates for new nicknames. We've created aliases appropriate for the many breast options a woman has after breast cancer surgery—there's something for everyone! Our hope is that some of these eye-roll-worthy names will make you smile (or groan) and help you keep a positive attitude. Enjoy!

Photo: AdobeStock/Voyagerix

For Those Who Undergo Lumpectomies:

1. Lump-free lattes

2. Seedless Watermelons

3. Nut-free cinnamon buns

Photo: pixabay/pixel 1

For Those Who Have Single Mastectomy:

4. The Lonely Mountain

This is for all The Lord of the Rings fans out there who also happened to have a single mastectomy. You might also be able to use The Two Towers if you later get a prosthetic or have reconstruction.

5. The Fraternal Twins

6. Tip & Dip

Do you still have one natural nipple but your reconstructed breast is flat? Meet Tip and Dip. Or Tippy and Dippy. Tipsy and Dipsy... Okay I'm stopping now...

Photo: AdobeStock/Africa Studio

For Those Who Choose Prosthetics

7. Strapped-In Sisters

8. I-can't-believe-they're-not-breasts!

9. Shoulder Swingers

10. Perky Portables

11. Low-Commitment Lady Lumps

Photo: AdobeStock/branislavp

For those with double Mastectomy with Reconstruction

12. Implant Islands

13. Silicon Sisters

14. Man-Made-Mammories

15. Dairy-Free Sundaes

16. Bionic Bosoms

17. Foobies (aka "Fake Boobies" Credit to Survivor Angela for this one!)

Photo: AdobeStock/baibaz

For Those Who Choose To Go Flat

18. Distant Mammories

19. The Great Plains

20. Feminine Flatlands

21. Low-Profile Lady Zone

22. "Chest is Best"

Photo: AdobeStock/Sergey Nivens

For Those Who Forgo Nipple Reconstruction

23. The Ultimate T-Shirt Boobs

24. Double Scoop No Cherry

25. Golden Globes

26. Cutie Cue Balls

Photo: AdobeStock/watcherfox

For Those Who Opt for Nipple Reconstruction or Nipple Tattoos

27. Big Tippers

28. High Beams

29. Top-of-the-line Toppers

30. Perky Pinnacles

Photo: AdobeStock/NSfotogyrl

Did we make you smile? Did we miss one of your favorite names? Let us know! Keep smiling, friends!