Unfaithful Ex-Wife Demands Ex-Husband Take Her to Their Son's Wedding as His Plus One
“Do not be misled: God is not one to be mocked. For whatever a man is sowing, this he will also reap." Galatians 6:7
In this viral post on Reddit's r/AmItheA--hole forum, a woman gets surprised and deeply hurt when her only son didn't invite her to his wedding. It's been years since her daughter caught her cheating on their dad and related the shocking incident to her older brother. Surely, her kids must have already forgotten about her act of unfaithfulness.
And now, she has been begging her ex-husband to take her with him as his plus one.
Should he?
The story was posted by this ex-husband under the username u/ParkingHalf181. He wanted to know what the AITA community thinks of the response he gave to his unfaithful ex-wife.
He wrote, "My son is 22, my daughter is 18. Six years ago, my daughter caught my wife with another man. She told her brother, who understood what she had witnessed, and then they both came and told me. I verified that it was true, then I divorced my wife. During the divorce hearing, both of them expressed a desire to stay with me, so I was given primary custody, with her getting 1 week a month. She moved in with the other guy."
What happened next? OP made communication with his ex-wife very limited, focusing only on custody coordination and shared expenditures. He never talked to his kids about his failed marriage.
However, his ex-wife kept complaining that their kids were making her life hellish when they were with her, telling OP that he needed to talk to them. And so, for the sake of peace, OP sat down with his kids and discussed the problem. His kids told him that they didn't want to be in the same house with their mom's lover, who wrecked their home. Still, OP advised them to be civil to them, at least until they turned 18 years old, to avoid going back to the court. From then on, he never heard another complaint from his ex-wife.
Time passed quickly, and OP continued his story. "When my son turned 18, he moved back in with me full-time and started college. He's graduated now and is getting married in a few months. My daughter turned 18 last summer and moved back in with me full-time too."
Those were very happy events for OP, until he received another call from his ex-wife, who was crying because their son didn't invite her to his wedding. Moreover, their daughter has also stopped talking to her ever since she turned 18.
OP didn't know how to console her at that point, and when he heard her next request, he was further pushed into a corner. OP said in his post, "Then my ex-wife asked if I would bring her as my plus one so she could see her son getting married, but I told her if my son didn't invite her, it wasn't my place to bring her. Then she started accusing me of turning them against me and threatening to take me to court, but I told her that there was no more custody agreement to take to court since both of them are above 18." That was when he hung up.
But OP sat down with his kids again to ask if they had stopped communicating with their mom. Brother and sister answered yes, and he told them that they didn't have to do it for his sake. She's still their mother, OP acknowledges that. But both siblings told him that they had planned it a long time ago, that they would hold out only until they were 18. They didn't like living with their mom and the guy who constantly reminded them of how their home got broken.
Since both kids are now adults, there was really nothing more that OP could do. He has to respect their decision.
However, when OP told his sister about what happened, she said that his son was being unfair to his mom and OP should convince him to invite her to his wedding.
Has OP been remiss?
It's his ex-wife who should be seriously reflecting on the reasons this kind of rejection has been happening to her. Her attitude has not changed after her kids learned about her immoral affair. Instead, after the divorce, she forced her kids to live with her and her lover even though they both hated him for hurting their dad and destroying their family.
And now, because she couldn't force OP to take her with him to their son's wedding, she furiously accused him of turning their kids against her.
This is a person who needs to have her head checked. Above all, she's so spiritually sick. She sowed anguish and poison, and she was expecting to reap sweet grapes?
Members of the AITA community have been advising OP and his son to hire security to make sure that his ex-wife couldn't crash the wedding on her own or with the help of OP's sister. Kind of sad that OP couldn't trust his own sister either, but then, no one can choose his relatives. But everyone reaps what they sow.
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