Birthday celebrations are important, and it does not stop in childhood. Everyone is entitled to feel special on the day they took their first breath. Celebrate it however you want and wherever you feel comfortable. Family and friends must understand your preferred celebration. A greeting, a gift, or spending time with them is already enough to make them happy. Most people take importance in enjoying the day with their loved ones. They plan activities, and no cancellations should occur unless there's a grave emergency. If not, it would be terribly rude and hurtful to abandon them on their birthday. Such behavior is inexcusable, especially if it has been happening almost every year.

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Parents are one of those people that should always be present on birthdays — virtually or in person. Their acknowledgment and excitement to celebrate with their children are important. Past wounds pile up, which could ruin the parent-and-child relationship in the future. Dancemaster212’s inner child was hurt so badly that he called out his mother on social media and shared their story on Reddit. Apparently, it has been a recurring issue in their relationship since he was 12 years old.

Photo: Pexels/Polina Tankilevitch

The mother would deliberately choose another event rather than celebrate his birthday together. And even if he’s already 21 years old, his mother never changed. OP was excited about his birthday, and the two of them already made plans. The mother asked him what he wanted to do, and he said all that mattered is that he gets to spend time with her. It was important for OP because he has been away for college for the past couple of years. “A week later, she tells me that she found a VR place that was open for my birthday and made reservations for us to go, which I was ecstatic about. She knew how much I loved VR, and her making the reservation was a good thing,” Dancemaster212 wrote.

Everything was set, yet the mother still chose to break her son’s heart. “A few days before my birthday, she calls me from her job and tells me she canceled our reservation to go on a 'date night' with her boyfriend. When I asked her why, she said it was the only day they could get a table for the restaurant. I told her she had made a promise to spend my birthday with me and now she’s breaking it,” OP explained. She suggested that he celebrate with his girlfriend, but OP mentioned that she’s away for work on a cruise. He ended up alone on his birthday, which pushed him to do something his mother won’t be able to avoid. Dancemaster212 posted the issue on social media — dividing his family's opinions. Despite the complaints from half of his family, he still hasn’t deleted the post.

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Choosing her boyfriend over their own her is certainly inexcusable. Parents must never forget that their children are their priority, especially when the plans were made even before the date night. Redditors completely understood OP and shared their thoughts. “NTA. She made plans with her child, then cancelled them so she could go to a restaurant. The restaurant ranked higher than you on her priorities. It's time to return that favour; don't put energy into a relationship that isn't even remotely close to being matched,” Hoplite68 commented. Perhaps OP should have a different plan for his next birthday. He should take a break from the drama caused by a mother that consistently forgets her child’s importance.

Photo: Pexels/Polina Tankilevitch

Some Redditors also asked OP about how often his mother cancels on him. He replied, “To answer your question, I’ve honestly lost count of how many times she’s done stuff like this and worse. She’s backed out of birthdays, competitions, performances, and makes up excuses every time. (I’m a dancer, I do parkour, and I ran track in hs.) And when I try to talk to her about it, she brushes me off because nothing I say or do matters to her.”

Seeking parental validation can truly be exhausting, mainly when they choose not to care. Hopefully, OP and his mother can have an honest conversation — for their relationship and the inner child that has been hurt too many times. Everyone’s dealing with scars, and this might be relatable for you. Write your thoughts about the issue below OP’s post to help him deal with the pain caused by a parent.